Pepe Haiku

What if, instead of chapter titles, one used haiku? I bounced that idea off my publisher as Pepe was being prepared for publication, but she didn't want to do it.

Anyway, I did have a whole set of haiku ready to use, and even had one file of my Pepe manuscript with the haiku in place. I've decided to post them on my Author's Den Page, for anyone who's interested.

There's a lot about poverty, slum life and homeless children there.

Here's one I actually made up in front of the creative writing class I was teaching for summer school over a year ago:

the boy with no shoes
now you see him, now you don't
my wallet -- it's gone!

Scot McKnight reviews Tolkien's Leaf by Niggle

Scot McKnight has a good review of a short story by J.R.R.Tokien, Leaf, by Niggle. I remember reading that book as a teen, not long after reading the Trilogy. I had recently thought that I would like to get my hands on it once again, as I remember that it dealt with issues of the present life, and how it affects the after life.

Anyway, Scot McKnight highlights some issues in which Tolkien demonstrates that the Christian belief is in stark contrast to that of Neo Platonism. That Greek philosophy held that this life is unimportant in comparison to the after life. In Leaf, by Niggle, the protagonist finds that his life long endeavour is only a prelude to what's to come.

The Story of Saint Catrick -- published at Smashwords

I've made a discovery which I think will be useful to myself and many other authors out there.

The book review I did in my last post was for a book that has been published online at Smashwords. I wanted to post the review on his authors page, and in doing so, I was required to open an account. Later, I realised that my Smashwords account entitles me to publish any of my other (unpublished) novels as well, for the low low price of... -- free!

I had never heard of that before. Either a publisher has to accept your manuscript (with the idea that he/she can sell it), or you have to pay them (as in the case of a subsidy publisher). The reason you pay them is that they put out a lot of work in formatting your manuscript for sale.

However, Mark Coker, the proprietor of Smashwords, has come up with a nifty computer program that will take a Word document (in .doc or .rtf format) and automatically distill it as a whole bunch of files for various e-book readers, including PDF, Kindle, Palm Pilot, Sony and (I think) all the ones Pepe is in. That costs him nothing, therefore, it costs me nothing. This has taken the e-book industry a step further.

Anyway, I decided to republish Catrick. It's now up at Smashwords. It's no longer free, but you can read the first 50% as a free sample before downloading the whole thing for US$2.00.

You can click here for Catrick and my Author's Profile.

Review: Absence of Faith, by Anthony Samuel Policastro

A narrative that incorporates elements of a mystery, disaster, medical thriller -- even, at times, a romance novel; I found Absence of Faith a good read.

Dr. Carson, while at the wheel, goes into a trance -- or is it death? It seems like he's descending into hell, is torn limb from limb by a demon dog, subject to intense fire, and meets the devil. He is heroically rescued by his wife from the river, but his vital signs fail. He awakens in the morgue.

His return to life is explainable as it's happened before in medical history. What mystifies the doctors is that his skin is burned all over as though he'd really been burning in hell.

Other people in the small religious community begin to have the same experience. It's dubbed the Hell Fire Syndrome.

Dr. Carson manages to hold to the view that it's no more than a rare unknown disease. For the local community, good religious folks who believe in heaven for the righteous, it has other implications. Mass hysteria is one of the results. But that's not all. There are the Satanists who take maximum advantage of the situation -- or are they the cause?

Has Satan won the ultimate battle between good and evil? Is it a curse? Is it a medical phenomenon? That's the mystery. At the end of the roller-coaster ride, Policastro brings it to a satisfying finish.

As a mystery and a thriller, it pleases. You've got your money's worth. No worries there.

After following Dr. Carson, his wife and medical colleagues for several chapters, we meet Kyle and Chantress. Kyle's introduction is a vivid display of textual special effects. Through a spirit medium, he learns deep dark secrets about himself that promise an interesting story.

Chantress is an old hand in New Age and Occult, whereas Kyle, despite the role he's to play, is a newbie. Chantress explains at great length, the difference between Satanism (the dark side), and New Age, or the light side. She considers herself the latter. With Kyle in toe she separates herself from the other, starts a new group and invites a few like minded friends along.

During some of the passages it seems as though the author has a lot to get off his chest and it behoves his characters to accommodate him. Examples: Chantress' explanation as to the reasons people choose to get into Satanism or New Age, later, Dr. Stoke's goes on about the value of religion in society, then there's an entire Sunday sermon, quoted verbatim. At times, I didn't know whether the book was pushing New Age, Occult, or Christianity.

The intimate scenes between Kyle and Chantress told me it definitely wasn't the latter. It's not a book you'd recommend to the youth of your local church. In this respect, it seemed like a romance novel (to me anyway). It goes from blissful love, to betrayal, to the kind of emotion that can only happen when a dream, once-in-a-lifetime relationship has gone horribly wrong.

That's not a spoiler. The medium, at the beginning, will have already told you that would happen.

The book feels authentic in many ways: as a medical thriller; the social turmoil in the small community; though I think the Satanists, as depicted here, are probably an urban myth. Certain sources that we used to rely on for this, such as The Satan Seller, have been discredited as fraudulent. (Covens and witches do exist -- as Wiccans, worshipping the goddess Diana, not the Biblical Satan. They’d probably choose to identify with Chantress in our narrative rather than the dark side).

However, like gun slingers of the wild west and KGB agents in Venice, they make a good story, and Anthony Samuel Policastro has played his hand well.

Robby Charters

bobcharters.blogspot.com

Book Proffesionals

I've joined a new Authors' group. To join, I had to agree to read four books by other authors on the group, and write a review of them. Hopefully, that means that Pepe will be also be reviewed four times.

My next post will be the first review I've written. Books reviewed here won't necessarily fit into the theme of this website, but as a more-or-less professional service. At least, the review itself should tell you if you ought to like them or not.

The Gospel of the Kingdom -- Jesus Creed

Scot McKnight has been talking about the Gospel of the Kingdom as presented in Luke's two books. (his Gospel, and Acts of the Apostles). He pinpoints many things that could correct our perception of the gospel message.

Forinstance, Campus Crusade's 4 Spiritual Laws and other similar bullet-point presentations, are not theologically wrong, just not the whole story. We're not giving the broader picture, only what applies to me, and, "how can I get to heaven?"

You'll find the following reconstruction on his most recent installment. You'll recognise the Campus Crusade version, but I believe this says it all:

God loves you and everyone else and has a plan for us: the kingdom community.

But you and everyone else have a sin problem that separates you and everyone else from God, from yourselves, from one another, and from the good world God made for you.

The good news is that Jesus lived for you, died for you, was raised for you, and sent the Spirit for you - so you all can live as the beloved community.

If you enter into Jesus' story, by repentance and faith, you can be reconnected to God, to yourself, to others, and to this world.

Those who are reconnected like this will live now as God's community and will find themselves eternally in union with God and communion with others.

Those who preach this gospel will not deconstruct the church. Instead, they will participate in what God is doing: constructing the kingdom community even now.

To get access to all the posts he done on this subject, use the Kingdom tag.

I'm a Redroom Author

Update on my previous post. I've now been approved as a Redroom author. I suppose, now I have to update the sidebar on this blogpage...

My new Redroom account

I've now got an account on Redroom, which is a site for authors and anyone interested in them. I've applied for status as an author, which they'll consider over the next couple of weeks. In the mean time, I've got a page, including a secondary blog site.

I found out about it through Derek Leman's blog. He's now a Redroom author.

Check it out, and visit a few authors...

The Story of St Catrick

For a limited time only, I'm posting this one as a free download. It requires some work before the publisher will look at it, so when I'm ready to submit it, I'll take it down again. The final released version will thus be different from this one. It's one I did several years ago, and represents some of my thoughts regarding ethnic reconciliation.

This was actually my first published novel. I did it through GreatUnPublished, a self publishing POD publisher, since taken over by Booksurge. I had to pay US$90 to get it done, which means it didn't matter how good it was. A lot of my friends liked it (at least, they said they did). My uncle, a Presbyterian minister like it very much.

Here's the blurb I used to have for it:

Maybe a bit like Wind in the Willows, except with a socio-political slant, it's about ethnic reconciliation, using animal species instead of human ethnic groups.

Catrick, a cat living in cat society, realises that the Maker didn't create animals to eat oneanother, but through the knowledge of the Maker animals will stop hurting each other. Catrick sets out to spread the knowledge of the Maker in the city of Catropolis where he lives, and begins to affect other cats, as well as rodents living in the various rodent ghettoes.

A species war is raging -- the rodents are fighting to free themselves from the shackles of cat-rule, and the cats generally assume they are the superior species. But as Catrick's message gains influence, it becomes a three way battle.

It seemed simple and straightforward at first, but neither Catrick nor his friend, David Mousecovitz realised what they are in for -- political agendas, prejudices, memories of past atrocities, fears, and countless reasons for not doing the obvious.

This might be about Northern Ireland, or it might be about Neo Nazis vs the Jews, or maybe blacks vs whites, or about Yugoslavia, Indonesia, or any one of countless focal points of cultural intolerance -- it's about what those who are truly committed to peace and reconciliation must be prepared to face.

Anyway, have a read ...

>>>note>>> as of 24, July, 2009, Catrick is no longer a free download. The above links will now take you to Smashwords.com, where you can read 50% of the novel as a free sample, before downloading the whole thing for US$2.00.

Silent Comix

It's a series of feature length cartoons that I hope will amuse everyone including non-English speakers and illiterate people.

I got the idea as I was teaching English to private students several years ago. I scrawled the cartoons on A4 sheets of paper with a pencil, had the students look at the cartoon and tell me the story in English. It worked pretty well. Later, I inked them in, scanned them, and touched them up a bit. Here are some of my best ones. ESL teachers may find these useful.

Read and enjoy...

Marketing Pepe

The book has been released for close to a month now. That is no guarantee that people are buying it. On one hand, the publisher and the editor did a lot of work, first in selecting it, then in helping to further turn it into a marketable product. At least, I'm confident it's something people will buy if the right people told them to buy it. It's not just me, then, who thinks it's a good book. But it will require marketing. That's where I am now.

Since it is an ebook, the obvious place to do that is on the Internet. I've submitted it to a few reviewers, whom I hope will help. I'm also tweaking my web presence so that search engines find me via key words people will be likely to use. There are also banner exchange services, and the web rings.

I've posted a new page just for Pepe: http://uk.geocities.com/Pepe_the_novel@btinternet.com Like this blog page, it rewards visitors with a chance to download free stories, novellas, etc. I'll soon re post some of my comix somewhere to add to the list of freebies.

Now, the obvious question: How does someone who hates consumerism go about marketing a book? Would it be like a Communist or a Nazi using the democratic system to campaign for the abolition of democracy?

I do have to live with myself, but I think there is a sensible answer: That's to recognise that our whole culture has been so moulded by the forces of consumerism, that probably the only way to totally avoid it is to become Amish. We're affected by it in ways we don't realise. However, if we pinpoint what it is about consumerism that we don't like, that is ugly, that is displeasing to God, we can carefully avoid some of the pitfalls without going off to live in the hills, and maybe even sell a book in the process.

Yeshua praised the man in his "parable of the unjust steward" who used filthy mammon to make friends of this world, saying, "The sons of this world are wiser than the Sons of Light". Recent study shows that Yeshua's use of the term "sons of light" could have been a reference to the Essenes, who would have been every bit as anti-consumerist as the Amish.

To steer a straight course, there are two things we need to avoid, 1: hype, and 2: worldliness. Marketing has been with us for thousands of years. Yeshua wasn't against markets. He only cleared the Holy Temple of people who were doing it in the wrong place while ripping people off. Hype is ripping people off, because it's stretching the truth, which is in effect, lying. I don't have to lie to say I think Pepe is good quality reading material. The other thing to avoid is worldliness. Consumerism has all but made a religion of "loving the world", in direct opposition to the Kingdom of God.

So, the only other question is, how heavy to market my book without boring all my friends...?

Pepe Now Available

Here it is folks... Pepe is now a published novel -- electronically, that is. Click on the graphic at the right to buy and download your copy for USD4.95.

Half of my royalties will go to Father Joe's Mercy Centre. They appear in the story as Fr. Antonio and Mercy House. That would be about USD1.20 would go to help homeless children and AIDS victims, the other USD1.20 will help put food on our table.

Anyway, here's jacket cover blurb:

The year is 2040. We have people living on Mars, but haven't sorted out life on earth yet. To the boy washing windscreens at the traffic signal, it could just as well be 1940.

The boy is Pepe. He doesn't know who his real parents are. His 'grandma' dies in a slum fire, and he is left to fend for himself and his grandma's biological granddaughter, Po, whom he treats like a real sister. They live in an abandoned construction site with other homeless children. With help from a young computer hacker named Raul and a mystical old man named Atsuko, Pepe discovers his true identity.

The villain: General Don Juan Clemente, who seized power from the king ten years ago, and installed himself as president for life. The General has a degenerative disease that is paralysing him. However, his brain has been linked to a computer network that enables him to control the country and destroy any threat to his power. Right now, his biggest threat is the very existence of Pepe.

coming VERY soon

Pepe is now in the process of being formatted for release. It should be any day now, that I replace this graphic at the right with one that says "Now Available".

The publisher prevailed on me for one last change. It's now set in 2040 and thereafter, not 2020. She thought 2020 was too early to expect the sea water to rise to the point where dikes were necessary to protect coastal farmland. It didn't matter to me whether it happened so soon -- actually it does matter! I hope it doesn't! -- but I also lament one bit where the general (who took over the country by force in 2002 (to be changed to 2042) has a campaign called "2020 - Cardovia's Year of Vision". However, I've been told now that opticians don't say 20-20 any more in reference to normal eye-sight.

As for keeping it in 2020, I suppose the only mistake would have been adding the prospect of global warming and rising seawater. I suppose it's not certain how soon they'll begin rising. It's just that I read Cosmos Magazine that the changes could be as early as 2020, so in a panic, I went to my manuscript and and added dikes to protect my beloved Cardovia from too much change.

The other technological advances described in Pepe are probably on target. We might have Binary to Neuro technology by then (linking computers directly to people's brains), which is one of the central high tech ideas in the book -- changing an already despotic head of state into the ultimate villain.

As far as missing it, I'd be in good company. I think William Gibson set his story, Virtual Light, in 2005. George Orwell was certainly off the mark for 1984 (aren't you glad?), and as for Arthor C. Clark's 2001 ...

Making sense of Messianic Judaism

In case anyone has any problem understanding Messianic Judaism, especially when trying to sort out all the different ideas and such being bandied around in the name of the said movement, here's a good post by Rabbi Derek Leman.

“Messianic Judaism” is a catch-all for a vague and general idea that attracts millions: the Jewish cultural context of the Bible virtually ignored in Christendom for millennia. Millions of Christians of all stripes and persuasions, from the Catholic and Orthodox Christian world to the Protestant, Evangelical, and Charismatic world are hungry to know more about Jesus the Rabbi. ... But many “Messianic Jewish” groups are simply Christians confused about who they are, who Israel is, and what God is doing in these times with his people Israel.

He goes on to list a few of the extremes, such as the "Two House" movement (the idea that all European Christians are probably descended from the 10 lost tribes, and therefore ought to be living kosher), those who view the traditional church as a pagan counterfit of what was meant to be the church, those who believe all believers need to be Torah observant, and more. Anyone who, like me, has tried to learn about Messianic Judaism by trying to read through the trail of web pages and chat room strings, will recognise them all.

At least I'm glad to have come across Derek's blog some time ago. Here's his own take on it, which I fully support:

Messianic Judaism at the core is about Jews and Gentiles who come alongside these Jews to be part of God’s work in the remnant of Israel. We believe that God is calling Jewish people to faith in Messiah within Judaism. ... Messianic Judaism is not an alternative to the Church. Messianic Judaism is a movement within Judaism formed by God and expressing in word and deed a Jewish faith in Yeshua.

Anyway, have a read yourself...

Political situation in Bangkok

A friend in Northern Ireland who works for a newspaper, asked me to send him a bit on what's happening here in Bangkok. The following is what I sent:

My dad left Bangkok on Tuesday, on the 13:45 Thai International Airways flight for London. I had to be at work, so I couldn't see him to the airport, but I got a phone call from him shortly before boarding time. All was well. He had taken a taxi to the airport, which is not far from our house.

My worst fear was that employees of all the state enterprises had planned to go on strike on Tuesday in support of the Democracy protest, and in retaliation for a bomb that had gone off at the government house (occupied by the protestors) killing one and injuring a few others. I didn't know if Thai International Airways was one of the enterprises that would be affected by the strike, so I had advised my dad to leave the house earlier, so as to ensure that he would be checked in, in case there were problems (long lines, etc.). There was no problem. He boarded, and they took off.

Probably while his plane was somewhere over Central Asia or someplace, I had put Abie to bed, and had actually fallen asleep, my mobile (which I use for an alarm clock) signaled that I had a text message. I use the service of one of the local English newspapers whereby they text the major headlines to my phone. I never get a text so late at night, but the text read that the airport had been closed, due to the protesters blocking the enterances. That was a bit disconserting. I was very glad my dad had left when he did, but apparently, about 10,000 other travellers weren't so fortunate.

As I said, we live close to the airport -- in fact, right under the flight path. It's cold season (Thai winter, making it feel like summer in Ireland), so the wind blows from the North, so the aeroplanes take off over our house this time of year, making it very noisy. That's been one of our major complaints about the house we're currently renting. However, for the last two days, it's been very peaceful!

However, we're not close enough to the airport to notice any activities or hear explosions or anything like that. The school where I teach (and Abie attends) is close by. Everyone just talks about it -- that's all.

Since sending the above to my friend, our school anounced that because we're in the emergency area, there would be no school the next day (Friday). At this moment (Saturday), we are down at my wife's parents' place. I hope school is back on on Monday.

Coming Soon...

Pepe has been through most of it's rounds of edits and rewrites, and I'm glad to say, is still very much the story I originally envisioned. The publisher has still to proof it one more time, and then format it to be ready for release.

In the mean time, I thought I'd spruce up this page a bit, as it will soon begin to double as an author's home page.

The Case for Protestantism

I've posted comments on this blog sometime ago, casting the Catholic Church in a facourable light, in particular, quoting Alan Creech on his return to the Roman fold. It's evident that the Holy Spirit does lead some to join the mother church, in spite of some factors that Catholics such as Alan Creech willingly share which tend to be on the negative side.

I have my own reasons for not joining. First, I haven't felt the leading of the Holy Spirit to become a Roman Catholic, nor an Eastern Orthodox. Despite many of my pro-Jewish, pro-rabbinical views, I have also not felt the leading to convert to Judeaism (even as a Messianic Jew). I apply Paul's advice to remain as one is, to both issues. I'm a "goy" from my mother's womb, and I remain a non-protesting Protestant.

Some of my reasons for not joining the Catholic Church are probably the same reasons I wouldn't join the Anglecan or the Reformed churches -- nor even Baptist. For one thing, I'm not a follower of Augustine (a fine saint, a shining testamony of faith, but I don't follow him in all of his theology which has formed a basis for both Roman Catholic and Reformed doctrine). Also, my perception of what is a minister, rather inhibits me from joining a group that has such a long tradition of elevating the clergy above the laity.

I also find that some of my reasons for not being a Catholic are the same as Scot McKnight's. Here is a very well written essay as to why he isn't Roman Catholic, nor Eastern Orthodox. It's a very good testimonial on behalf of Protestantism, without being anti-Catholic (I hope it's understood that one can be critical without being 'anti-')

Anyway, here it is...

Does Grace Cancel Holiness?

Rabbi Derek Leman has a good post, actually a repost from last year's Yom Kippor.

He opens with this:

I was reading the blog of a well-respected Christian intellectual who holds a high-visibility post in Christian media. He espoused an idea I hear sometimes which troubles me greatly: that grace means we should be realistic and not expect too much holiness in Christendom as a whole. That is, we should not be surprised when we hear surveys showing that Christians are no different than non-Christians in areas like marriage, sexual sin, and so on.

I hadn't actually heard anyone in Church leadership come out and say that, but that seems to be the trend of the Western church of the 20th century. Rabbi Derek's post is deffinately worth a read.

I could only add, people mistake grace for mercy. Mercy is what's been holding back G-d's hand of judgment on the Western Church for not taking advantage of grace. Grace is there to enable us to become holy. Proper use of mercy is to seek forgiveness when we fail.

RobbyMac on Apologies

RobbyMac has put out a creative piece entitled Apology at OK Corral. He deals with the fact that:

"...so many people apologize, and immediately say 'forgive me'. And, maybe this will sound a little weird, but sometimes it feels like they ask for forgiveness as a way of not really dealing with the damage they've caused."

He calls this "'Apology At Gunpoint'; where if you don't 'forgive and forget' immediately, you become the problem."

He's not down on apologies -- just the fake ones that we all tend to do just a little more often than we should.

The Future of Ebooks

Articles like this make me feel good about the fact that my novel is being published by an electronic media publisher. It's a rebuttal by Alexander Wolfe to a statement by Ray Bradbury that ebooks will never take off.

I found it via Website At the End of the Universe in which Capt. Zerox has more things to say on the subject:

I think both ebooks and paper books both have a future. Neither media is going to replace the other, just like movies weren't replaced by television, but I can foresee a time that people read the news or the latest bestseller on some low-cost, portable electronic reader that mimics analog books.

An earlier post of his even says, Publishers wonder whether ebooks have reached critical mass.

However, at this point, we're still making plans that fit strictly with our current income from teaching school, plus faith in the Most High. I've been burned too often by pinning my hopes on something that hasn't actually materialised yet.

to the least of these

Alan Chreech has been putting two and two together and getting something we all need to be paying attention to. There's the saying 0f Yeshua, "whoever does it to the least of these has done it to me", which we all know, but if you look at it in the light of another one, "Love one another as I have loved you...", it goes abit deeper. Here's what he says:

... What if God actually wanted us to love people for who they really were? I'm serious about this now. I believe God wants us to purely love the nasty, torn up people that we are looking at AS nasty, torn up people, not just as a mask for Jesus. ...

... better if you read the whole post...

Novella -- The Wrong Time

I've had an idea for this novel for quite a long time. I finally got around to writing it, and it turned out to be more of a novella -- too short for a novel, but too long for a short story.

It's in the Science Fiction genre, an exploration of the "Many Worlds" interpretation of Quantum Mechanics. That means it's about parallel universes.

It's hard to find a publisher for novellas, so I'll just post it on the site as a free douwnload -- yet another incentive to visit the author's page once my novel, Pepe, hits the market.

So, here it is .... The Wrong Time

Two Problems

I found this via Next Reformation. It's a pair of questions that seems to go the heart of what's wrong with Christianity today:

1. Present day Christians are not very good at accepting outsiders (sinners who do not follow Jesus).

2. Present day Christians are far too accepting of sinful behavior from insiders (Christians who have been following Jesus long enough to know better).

Shouldn’t it be just the opposite?

Any thoughts about why this is so?

Some good thoughts expressed on both blogs.

Alan Creech on (un)faithful Catholics

Alan Creech has an interesting discussion going on his blog regarding how much flexibility of opinion there is within Roman Catholic Church. There seems to be quite a good margin for what he calls "faithful dissent" although some of the more conservitave Catholics might brand you as an "unfaithful" Catholic.

Quite a few Catholic Emergent types have weighed in. I, as a "Protestant by default (believe in Yeshua but wasn't baptised Catholic)" commented that maybe the only true "Protestants" might be found inside the Catholic Church (at least there, they know what they're "protesting" about!).

This one, by a Catholic named "Tom", who got his education at a "conservative" Catholic university, had this to say:

I've often felt that the Church's insistance on infalibility--even though widely misunderstood--creates a Pandora's box of sorts. When an institution insists that it not only doesn't make mistakes, but cannot make mistakes, then the historical record becomes problematic and requires mental gymnastics.

Anyway, go there for a good read...

Call for Apostles

I found the link to this while reading Charlie Wear's blog:

Where are all the apostles?
I find myself missing them more and more lately. Which is interesting because I'm not even sure what I'm missing. What is it I want an apostle to do for me? It seems like there must be something. Is there anyone in the Church today that has the authority to say the kinds of things that Paul did? We're drowning in opinions and strategies and "movements" and "we just need to get back tos." But we don't seem to have anyone that can stand up and say, "I'm an apostle by the will of God. All this nonsense has to stop because it's divisive and it's fruitless. And whoever disagrees with me, let's just see which of us God's power stands behind!"

That was Scott Bane. It's been a while since I heard anyone talking about apostles. I believe apostles are to be a part of the latter-time landscape. I'm aware that many people who claim to be apostles, or saying that this one or that one is an apostle (and therefore you're out of order if you don't listen to him/her), but I don't believe they've fully arrived yet. If they have, they're hidden for the moment. The test of who's really an apostle may well be what Scott says above, someone with the boldness to suffix his proclamation with, "...and whoever disagrees with me, let's just see which of us God's power stands behind!"

That would only work for a true apostle.